Backcountry Bob's Law

G's spring break this past week meant that we packed up the car and headed out to the middle of nowhere to camp.  It also meant I would be offline for the week and had to figure out how to schedule my week's posts.  Not difficult to do, but I (un)wisely decided to wait and write this one upon our return...  

Our return was scheduled for Thursday.  I'm currently taking a weekly course that will allow me to finish up my Gifted Endorsement requirements and add it to my teaching certificate.  The class is Thursday evenings, so the plan was to return home early in the afternoon, get cleaned up, then head to class... 

Backcountry Bob's Law (which I just made up - same guy who guarantees whichever spot you're standing in will be the one the campfire smoke blows toward) says that every camping experience you have will be full of unexpected problems surprises that will make the trip memorable.  While packing up the tent, I shook G's sleeping bag out to remove some of the 5 bagillion pounds of dirt, sand, and leaves that had accumulated from having a small human nap there after hours of crawling around in nature, eating it, digging in it, wallowing in it... 

The bag packed up, I step out of the tent and notice something flat and shiny amongst the leaves.  "Did you know your phone was out here in the leaves?" I hollered.  "It must've fallen out of your pocket when you got out of the tent!"  

"Nope, it wasn't in my pocket," G responded, "it was in my sleeping bag, along with the car keys."  

Oh, dear... 

The keys were found and assurances made that those were the only two items hiding away in the sleeping bag.  Of course, it was now much later than we'd planned to leave... 

Here's a tip:  don't camp in the wilderness for a week with no bathroom and then plan to make it back in time to get cleaned up and then head to a class where you've got to give not one, but two presentations.  Yup, two.  

We pulled into the parking lot where I jammed my dirty sock-clad-feet back into my filthy campsite shoes and re-tightened my dirt-encrusted zip-off hiking pants and threw on the only non-tanktop-style shirt I had with me...after digging it out of the dirty clothes bag, where I'd stuffed it earlier, along with the damp baby pants and other similar unsavory items... 

Did I mention we'd been without a bathroom for a week?  Not something that bothers me so much out in the woods, but let's just say my greasy hair - which I shoved hastily into a hair clip after a quick finger brush out - was in competition with my equally greasy forehead and the six layers of dirt that had collected under my fingernails for item most likely to cause me to yearn for a rock to crawl under to avoid having to stand up in front of all of these other fresh-from-work teachers and act like some professional expert on the article and case study I had to present...

The good news is, I survived the whole ordeal.  A table-mate actually said she'd never have known that I'd been camping, because I looked just like I normally did.

I didn't quite know how to take that, because I was really dirty and I'm generally quite clean and put-together when I attend this class.

Hmmm, might not make so much of an effort in the future...

So the class gets over late at night and we still had to unpack the car this morning and I had to head out to do some tutoring and so that's what's got me realizing that saving a post for my return is not the smartest idea I've ever had, although just think what you'd have missed out on if I'd planned things differently.

And yes, the first thing I did when we walked in the door last night was get Gv and myself clean.

And no, that whole ordeal was not the only problem exciting event from the trip, because Backcountry Bob's Law also states that like a bag of Lay's Potato Chips, you can't have just one.  

Our tent also broke.

As in, snapped in two and punctured the rainfly - all from the insanely high winds we encountered on Wednesday.

Yes, I said snapped in two.

Notice I also said we returned on Thursday, which meant we spent one night sleeping in that broken tent, after it had snapped in two.

Maybe I should write a post about how to monkey around with a broken tent so that you can eek out one final night of your vacation...

It really was a good trip.  One that we will never forget, I'm sure.  You can bet that when I upload the photos this weekend, one of them will probably show up in Monday's Project Snapshot post, so be on the lookout for that little gem a few days from now.

Do you have any good camping stories?  If you camp, I'm sure you do!  I can think of some other doozies myself, but I'd love to hear from some of you!  Share them below or email me at lisahealy (at) outlook (dot) com.

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